Maori apologises for being Aprils Fool

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In front of 4 angry kuia and 2 mad looking uncles, Potaua “The Bro” Biasiny-Tule, editor of TangataWhenua.com was forced to hold a press conference explaining his poor jokes and bad online behaviour on 1st April 2013, April Fools Day.

eastereegg“I would like to apologise to our Prime Minister John Key, to the National Party and to the whanau of Tau Henare, Hekia Parata and Simon Bridges – no there will not be a snap election today and no, you did not steal all the chocolates.”

“I would like to apologies to the iwi of Tainui and Ngati Whatua, as well as to Tukuroirangi Morgan. Although we would all love to support a Maori Space Programme, it is technically impossible to strap booster rockets on to the Sky Tower and get it off the ground let alone, fly it to space or Mars. There is no Tainui Space Programme (at least, that I am aware of).”

“I would also like to apologise to the Queen and her whanau, who probably don’t even know where Aotearoa is, let alone made any announcements giving back all stolen lands to Maori, the Australian Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islanders, and to the indigenous peoples of Canada. I wanted to be a funny guy and say what many of us had hoped for all of our lives and while we’d like this news to be true, it was really a series of stink jokes told in poor taste.”

“And before I get the Island Broom from my Kuia, I would like to personally apologise to all of our readers who had their grumpy pants on today. Perhaps April Fools jokes aren’t Maori but laughing most certainly is. I would like to apologise to you for having no humour left. And also to the Easter Bunny and to Jesus for spoiling your day. Aroha mai.”

Mr Biasiny-Tule was last seen being dragged out by his ears to the wood shed…

8 COMMENTS

  1. Wow! You would have to be pretty thick to take any of those jokes seriously and to ask for an apology just reiterates the thickness of the offended party. It’s like the gift that keeps on giving! Da hahahahaha shot cuzzy, love your jokes made me smile. Everyone else, do us a favor and smile ay. Cause it’s your day! 🙂 Dahahaha.

    • Bahahaha i loved it and im sori that peole could not see the funny side of your korero much love nephew xox

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